Friday, June 27, 2008

The Family Side of Foreclosure (Part 1)

So many times we hear about all off the amazing Foreclosure deals...which I remember thinking, "Wow, if only I had a little extra money stashed away, I could become a Real Estate mogul and when the economy turns around I'll be rich!" I often wonder how many people think the same way?

Now my family is at the other end of the Foreclosure deal. We are struggling to come up with enough money to save our home. Our mortgage, property taxes, credit card bills, food and gas is putting us deeper and deeper in debt. I thought I would share our story...a perspective from a family on the brink of losing their dream.

Here's a little background info:

We are currently almost three months behind on our mortgage, property taxes are due, three months behind on our HOA (homeowners association dues), credit cards are maxed out (supplementing our incoming by using them), the boys are eating twice as much, (they're all growing right now), sports for football season alone is costing us $3,300.00 (3 boys play), and GAS (about $200.00 a week). Our home value has dropped considerably, was worth about $650,000.00, now worth less than we owe. Now that you understand the situation, I'll fast forward to our first attempt to make arrangements with the bank.

My husband called the bank today and told them we would make a payment on the 30th (don't know where the full amount is coming from...but I'm working on the faith thing!) Then they asked, "When can you make your next payment?" He said, "I don't know?" They snapped, "You have to give us another date!" "Okay...I guess the 15th". He called me at work and I asked, "How are we going to come up with it at the end of the month and the 15th and still buy food and gas?" He got ticked off, "I DON'T KNOW, I'm trying to by us time." Hmm, that was a great start!

Usually when finances are tight we are arguing all the time, the stress just gets to be too much, especially when we are working more hours, barely see each other, and still not able to pay our bills. Since becoming Christian (we both always believed but had been doing our own thing), we have really been trying to not rely on ourselves to get us through this...faith, hope and trusting that God has a plan for our lives. But of course we are only human...so the stress of our situation takes over and we have really been going at it lately. I try to lose myself in the computer and writing, while he asks every night, "Do you think maybe we can spend a little time together?" I don't know what my problem is, I just don't want to talk, or be around him right now. I know it's not his fault, and he is working his butt off, but I just want to be left alone! This is how I deal with stressful situations...I push all my emotions deep inside, run around like crazy, don't sleep, become emotionally unavailable for my family and stay on the computer writing for HOURS on end. I try to find a place to hide and escape from my reality.

Then off to work I go everyday...to a luxury Newport Beach, CA office where my bosses are Millionaires and don't have a care in the world about finances, while I try to put on my happy face, and act like my life is perfect too, (I'm really good at fooling everyone.) I try very hard not to feel sorry for myself, I pray, do a Bible study and watch Joyce Meyers every morning before I leave...it really does help! But my human side comes back, and I start to struggle again.

Stay tuned for Part 2....

My Journey
By: Lisa Petrarca

Darkness crowds around me
Squeezing out my air
Take in a deep, cold breath
A few more steps, just walk
Look at the light ahead
Faint but steadily shining
Calling out my name
My feet are slowly moving
It seems far away
My strength is disappearing
The light's calling me to come
The darkness is thick and stifling
It never seems to end
The light is getting closer
My feet begin to run
It overtakes the shadows
The light now surrounds me
I've made it through the dark
The light is so amazing my journey has just begun


Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he saved them from their distress. He brought them out of darkness and the deepest gloom and broke away their chains. (Psalm 107: 13-14)

5 comments:

April said...

Sorry about your situation Lis. It seems like everything is so tough right now, with the economy, and employees not getting raises to keep up with the inflation. I think many people don't think of the families who have lost their homes to foreclosure, and how difficult it must be for them. I'll pray for you guys and keep the faith that everything will work out.
I love you!

~Trish~ said...

Keep your chin up sweetie!! Let me know if you want my email addy, I'd love to help you keep your mind off of things but emailing about stupid silly things...if that would even help!! Love ya!

Lisa Petrarca said...

Thank you guys...and I love email's!

Janae said...

Aunt Lis -

You are a stud for trying to be faithful and use the Secret to get where you need to be.

Kudos to you for your morning Bible study (I read scriptures every morning too, SO important).

You are in my prayers...

Unknown said...

Oh... totally in the same boat here only haven't made a house payment since November. It's been on the market for almost a year now and NOTHING. I too work in an office with people who make BIG BUCKS and when they stand around trying to complain about how "bad" things are it's all I can do to hold my tongue....