Life, Kids & Lessons

I was excited to see that one of Jullien's recent photo shoots by photographer David Wang was featured on MODELS.COM (Click Here To Leave a Comment).

When he first was signed with Red Models they put his pictures up and it's cool to see that they are still impressed with him as he continues to grow in his career.

I'm so proud of all my boys...Josh is going to Cosmetology school full time and just passed all his tests and is now getting hands on training in the school's student salon. He is also working part time and paying his way through school by himself. I'm so thankful that he has been able to find something that he enjoys doing. He wants to eventually open up his own Rock n Roll style salon.

Elijah just finished football & had an awesome season. He's feeling a little bored with all the extra time he has on his hands. He didn't want to try out for the school basketball team, he wants to play for the fun recreational league instead. He is just waiting till his second favorite sport starts...Track. He received his first progress report and is getting all A's & 1 B.

I have to laugh...I never thought my two manly, athletic boys would end up in the beauty industry. Life's a funny thing...we come up with all kinds of ideas of what our kids will grow up to be. But all we can really hope for is that they are able to pursue and follow THEIR dreams.

I often thought that I was doing all of the guiding and teaching but as the kids got older I've learned that they are also teaching me life lessons as I grow with them along the way.

The Loss of Daul

Photos of Model Daul Kim

Four months ago I stumbled across Daul Kim's Blog through Models.com. Daul was a famous Korean Model who was also a very talented painter. She wrote for a magazine and made frequent television appearances.

I've been following & commenting on Daul’s Blog regularly. Her deep sadness and sorrow was evident in her writing. I felt a sense of protectiveness because of her vulnerability. I always tried to write uplifting things to encourage her. She never responded but she did visit my Blog several times. I continued to feel the need to read her writings daily...I wanted to help her in some way. Trying to reach her deep lonliness. I last left a message on November 8th. Nothing inspirational or encouraging just idle talk. I clicked on her Blog late Wednesday night the 18th (her final post)...but never left a comment. She had posted a You Tube video with techno music and a final post: "say hi to...forever."

Upon hearing of her passing I felt such a deep sorrow. She was not only beautiful, but a deep, passionate & intelligent person. Reports say she was found hanging in her Paris apartment on November 19th by her boyfriend.

What could have been said to help her and change this? What did everyone around her miss?

My answer would have to be…no one ever knows the extent of someone’s depression. They become masters at hiding the pain behind humor. The mask that is worn is often a perfect disguise. But the writings tell of something deeper. We each need to really LISTEN to those around us who may be secretly crying out.

You will be missed Daul.

My prayers go out to her family and friends. Such an incredible loss of a beautiful, talented and intelligent, 20 year old girl with her whole life ahead of her.

Cleaning, Schedules...AND SLEEP!

Elijah & Donald called up together as OUTSTANDING Linebackers!

Da Boys-Ryan, Cooper, Donald, Elijah & Trenton

Ryan, Cooper, Donald & Elijah (STUDS)

Chowing Down at Edison's Freshman Football Banquet

Wow, I haven’t updated my Blog since the weekend. So here’s what’s been going on, Sunday we had Elijah’s end of the year Football banquet. They made a really cool video for each of the boys. At the end they added outtakes. We were all cracking up! It was really well done and I loved it because the showed all of Elijah’s touchdowns and interceptions.

Monday I had the day off because my boss was on vacation. I had a lot of stuff planned to take care of because my good friend Debbie is coming to stay with us for a while. But of course nothing ever goes as planned. I got up, ate some oatmeal, laid down to read my morning devotional and fell asleep until 1:00 P.M.!!

Then I spent the rest of the day cleaning Jullien’s room for Debbie to stay in while he’s gone. What a nightmare! I can’t believe how kids can find so many hiding places for all their crap when you tell them to clean their room! I even found clothes that he’s had since he was 12. That took me the rest off the day, but I finally got it all done. If Juj’s was that bad I’m afraid to see what is hiding in Elijah & Adams room. That will be a project for another day.

Josh has been staying in Juj’s room since he’s been gone. I told him he could move into Elijah & Adam’s room while Debbie is here, but I think he got mad that I asked him to move and said, “NO, I’ll just stay with friends for a while.”

Whatever...I’m not going to stress about it, he’s a big boy and if he wants to act like a baby I’m not going to let it get to me.

On a positive note, I fell asleep at 10:00 p.m. last night. I’ve been so worn out from going to sleep at 2:00 a.m. every night, (insomnia). I feel really good today...sleep is AMAZING!

18 TODAY IN NEW YORK...

Photo: Jon Malinowski

Today is my son Jullien's 18th birthday. I already blogged about his almost 18th birthday, which we celebrated early knowing that he would be in New York again on the actual day. I miss him so much, but I'm proud of him and excited that he is able to travel and see the world.

I never would have pictured him having a career in modeling. He was my only son who HATED to have his picture taken. He would hide and when I'd find him, he refused to smile. Most of the pictures I have are with him scowling.

Life's a funny thing!

My son, the ultimate athlete. The all-star on every team, in every sport. His will and determination to be the best is like nothing I've ever seen before. He is fearless. A quality that I admire so much. I think too many of us let fear control our lives. Jullien has taken this opportunity and ran with it. At 18 years old, he has so much ahead of him...he has learned the importance of seizing the moment. I love him and am so grateful that I was blessed with such an AMAZING son.

JULLIEN=Character, integrity, sense of humor, loving, compassionate, determined, loyal, and trustworthy. I couldn't be prouder of the man you've become.

Manuel de la Cruz Show-New York Fashion Week S/S 10

Copperwheat Fashion Show-New York Fashion Week S/S 10

Photo Shoots


Photo: Jon Malinowski

Dazed & Confused Magazine-Photo: Terry Tsiolis


Photo: Eric Mas

Photo: Jon Malinowski

DILEMMAS MAGAZINE- Aug. 2009 Edition

Mon Ari/Book Homme Fashion Show-New York Fashion Week S/S 10

Backstage at Fashion Show

New York Fashion Week S/S 10

Photo: Jon Malinowski

DOUBLE CLICK ON SCANNED PICTURES TO SEE LARGE VIEW


Edison Football-Voted 1st Team All Sunset League Linebacker


Edison Basketball Team

NJB Basketball

HVLL Major Angels

Edison Volleyball Team

Jullien Surfing

HAWAII Championship Pop Warner Football Game

Huntington Valley Championship Major All-Star Team
(almost made it to Little League World Series)

Baby JuJu

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY JUJU!! I LOVE YOU!

Check This Out...

We woke up on Friday morning at 1:30 a.m. to head over to the high school to decorate for the traditional Edison vs. Fountain Valley Bell game. I've never been able to participate in prior years because I couldn't get off of work. I was finally able to this year. I have to tell you it's A LOT of work but it is worth it! The entire school is completely covered...even the sidewalk. Here's some pics~














Normally I wouldn't have a problem, but half way through it my back was KILLING me. I had to wear that stupid boot since I broke my foot and a tennis shoe on the other foot. I was totally lopsided...which I didn't even think about at the time. But three hours into it I was DYING! I felt like an old person...I was hobbling around holding my back.

Everyone went out to breakfast afterwards, but not me...I went home took four Advil & went to sleep. I was planning on waking up to go to the pep rally, but I was passed out. I finally woke up at 2:00 p.m. My back was still ridiculous...I started to get ready for the game, took more Advil and with total dread, put on that stupid boot. I'm over that thing!!

The good news is we beat Fountain Valley, no we KILLED them...it wasn't even a contest. Funny because it was televised and hyped up so much. We were both 8-0, with the winner basically sealing the championship. So it looks like we will be the #1 seed heading into CIF Championships in two weeks.

My back is feeling better too...just can't wait to be done wearing this boot. Next year I will make sure I'm not such a clutz so I can enjoy it a little more!

WAY TO GO EDISON!!

I GOT DISSED?

We had our dinner night last night. It went better than I expected, however I did get a little bit of a cold shoulder from someone who I have been friends with for about 9 years. She just wasn't herself with me. I guess I could feel it so I just didn't make an effort either. That's what I tend to do...just ignore, stand behind the safety of my carefully built wall. It has served to protect me from years of hurt. It's definitely served its purpose, however lately I've been praying for help to tear it down. I've really wanted to open myself up to people other than those whom I feel safe with.

I felt like I was having a break through and really stepping outside of my comfort zone, until all of this. Of course I run right back behind it and shut down. I put on my tough girl image, the one that says, "I don't care if you don't like me! You don't matter to me anymore either." I've closed the door on several friendships after incidents like this.

At the Freshman game today, which we WON (34-6), she did it again. I tried to say Hi twice. She just looked at me and didn't say anything. I thought, "Ok...I'm done trying. If you're going to be like that I can easily be done too (my wall growing thicker with each incident).

Then just as the games ending, she asks me a question, like nothing's wrong. Now I'm thinking what is up? Did she just not see me the two times I walked right in front of her and waved? Am I reading into it because I'm expecting this. I don't know...it's just too much! I don't want to deal with this high school drama at my age!

Just when I'm really ready to tear down my walls...something scares me and back I go to my safe distant place!

Stop The Drama

Lately I feel like I've been getting caught in a lot of drama. I'm not one of those people that enjoy sitting around gossiping & complaining about people. I think that's why I've always found it easier to just hang out with the guys, talk about sports and crack jokes.

Lately however, I've gotten thrown into the middle of a lot of crap. I try not to get upset and sucked into it...but it's hard. I even started breaking out! That's when I said, "Zit's is where I draw the line!"

So yesterday I decided to stop adding fuel to the fire by joining in. I made a decision to take the high road. I sent out an email to everyone explaining a few things that I knew they probably didn't want to hear. But the bottom line is, everyone can sit around complaining, talking about each other and getting mad, but at the end of the day nothing's changed except making a lot of people bitter and angry towards each other.

My email was very nice but made a point. I received a couple positive feedbacks thanking me for putting it out there in a nice way. Tonight we have a team dinner...we'll see if anythings changed. I definitely will stick to my plan. I might get excluded because of it, but I will feel less stressed and better about myself for not joining in not to mention...maybe my face will clear up before the weekend! Gosh...being a girl sucks sometimes...we are all SO DRAMA!!

Monday Monday

During the weekend, it always seems like Monday is looming over me like a dark cloud. Today I decided to embrace my Monday. Yes I have to go to work, but on a positive note, I don't have to be there until 10:00 a.m. I got to sleep in and with the time change I feel pretty good.

On Monday's I work for a bookkeeper (I'm an Independent Contractor), then I work for a Commercial Real Estate Development Co. the rest of the week. Today me and my two bosses (the bookkeeper & office mgr. at the Real Estate Co.) are going to see the new Michael Jackson movie "This Is It." I think from now on instead of thinking, "Monday again!" I'm going to try and figure out something fun to look forward to every Monday. I wonder if this will work?